pathological demand avoidance Archives

Not Everything is a Lesson (Be Like Elsa: Let it Go)

March 5, 2024

A teachable moment is the time at which learning a specific idea is at its easiest. Unfortunately in pop psychology has twisted this to become something along the lines of “I can see the issue presenting itself, so let’s use this opportunity to turn it into a lesson.” And often that when the teachable moment appears, it must be addressed immediately. Sometimes this is fantastic, because it gives a tangible, applicable, relevant context. However there[…]

Modelling or Coddling: Helping With Tasks

May 29, 2023

When your neurodivergent child insists they can’t do something you know they can do, or simply asks for help with a task you think they should be doing independently at their age, a decision needs to be made. Do you insist they do it, or do you help? If the latter, are you actually helping, or are you setting a dangerous precedent? Will they rely on you forever? Will they fail to learn the skills[…]

When You Just Can’t: Task Paralysis

April 4, 2023

Task paralysis is incredibly annoying. For everyone involved. There are many theories as to why it happens, or what it means, but the reality of it is simply an extreme case of involuntary procrastination and avoidance of a task. Task Paralysis is a common form of ADHD Paralysis, and one I struggle with massively. Evidently. Let me begin by sharing with you the irony of finding myself facing task paralysis when wanting to write an[…]